Saturday, April 11, 2009

Hurting the One you Love

Can I write about how the man who loves me, wants to hurt me,
and the difficult time that I am having coming to terms with that idea.

Can I write about the fact that I want him to hurt me,
and the difficult time that I am having coming to terms with that idea.

Can I ask why this fascinates me so?
Because it does; I am completely mesmerized and captivated by the concept of the one who adores and cares for me, taking pleasure in causing me discomfort and pain.

Can you tell me please, why this is so very erotic?

I can write poems about it,
and read about it,
and talk about it,
but still....
I do not understand,
and still....
I am bewitched, bewildered, intrigued, starvacious,
him to love me tenderly,
and hurt me harshly.

Can you tell me please, why this is so very erotic?


  1. I don't know how long you've been on your submissive journey, or how long you've been in this relationship but, for me, I gave up trying to understand 'why' a long time just is.....very erotic.

    love and hugs xxx

  2. When I attempted to find out why I feel this way, I was able to read the descriptions of the psychological and physical reasons for this longing. Yet, it explained nothing to me. I can read the writings of others who feel this way, and I can understand, comprehend, and agree with those expressions.

    We are who we are. I don't know if that can be explained. For me, the only solace I could find was that there were those who thought, acted and felt as I do, and they became cohorts, acquaintances, friends, and in a few instances, lovers, and Dominants.

    I am my kink. This path makes me feel alive, allows me to enjoy life, and brings to me more satisfaction, love, and pure joy than anything else.

    I do not understand how a lightbulb works, or how my car runs, nor do I truly understand that money is merely energy converted into a physical thing which brings me more material objects to which I attach emotional strings.

    This path is erotic, and enjoyable, and I will not live another day without it. That is all I need to understand.

  3. Hi M:e! I have been traveling for approx. 1 1/2 years, thus far, and I wish to get to the point where things just "are" and I don't have to question them is very difficult for me to do that, however.

    Dear cp.....once again you articulate and explain things so very well. I totally understand and can relate to your words and I, too, am finding it a great benefit to befriend like-minded females to share and talk with.

    I tend to question everything and am not content unless I have answers; but I am slowly realizing that this particular aspect of my person, I might have to just settle into and simply....."accept".

  4. charli, i don't think there is an answer,or at least not one answer that fits all. i think for each of us we have to find the answer within ourselves, and come to some type of terms, and exceptance of what we find erotic. that is the best answer that i can give.

  5. The picture is far more arousing than many naked women pictures...

    "Can you tell me please, why this is so very erotic?"
    Through one of my lenses, it's because you let go of (or he takes down) your defenses and emotions like love & pain become pure emotional energy. And it's the one of the most intense state that we can experience. You want it because you can feel that it exists and because you know that you can this amount of energy without any kind of protection.

    At least that's the unconscious process that might make it so erotic for you.

    As long as I am concerned, the most arousing thing here is you, your words, your craving for life, your (supposed?) ability to completely experience LIVING.

  6. "that" is a very nice compliment!.....I am doing my best to eliminate the word "supposed" from my life and truly "live" the experience (of life).