Sunday, August 9, 2009

My Perfect Man

Hmmm......let's examine this one.

He, first and foremost, has a Daddy mentality, that is.....caring, nurturing, supportive; gentle and loving to a fault. He does my buttons up after he puts my coat on and always makes sure I am dressed appropriately for the elements. He ensures that I exercise and eat properly and take my vitamins everyday; always supporting, allowing, and facilitating my growth, as a strong and independent person. He shows his love in soft ways, such as rubbing my back or brushing my hair; I often sit on his knee while I'm talking to him.

Because we have agreed to live within a D/s framework, he has authority to correct or punish me as he sees fit. He does not do this as a game or for pleasure, but only when he feels it is seriously warranted. I do not act like a child with him; we do not enjoy "age-play"; I am myself, at all times, this works out because I am a very young and playful spirit (childlike at heart).

There is another side to this man, a darker side. His personality changes with his moods. He has a firmer streak, bordering on sadistic. On these occasions he often treats me harshly, both verbally and physically, and very much enjoys making me cry. Sometimes he will bruise me but, because his priority is my safety and well being, he will not risk the possibility of infection by breaking my skin. The exception to this would be needle play, which I'd like to experiment with, but this is always done with the utmost concern for safety.

I will sometimes address him as Daddy, but more often as Sir, or his given name, and this will fluctuate depending on the situation we find ourselves in.

He will slowly introduce me to the new world I have chosen to explore. When I am ready he will take me to places where there are others like us, so I can watch and learn and actually "be" with kindred spirits, something I have never had the chance to do.

We will explore each other in unconventional ways, kinky ways, even sick ways. He will allow me to let go and be free to be me, without judgment.

I will take care of him and serve him but he will always be strong and independent, never allowing me to mother him (he'll be too busy Daddying me)...something I have done with my ex-partner for the last 21 years. He will make me meals as often as I make them for him and we will, also, enjoy preparing them together. Food is sensual and should be shared, both in the making and in the eating.

What have I forgotten?.......lots, I'm sure.


  1. Wow this is spot on! My list would be very similar to yours - very interesting. Thanks for articulating these points - I have never made such a list but I can see that it is a good idea because it is too easy to forget what it is we truly want or need in this life and get carried away with the tide.

  2. BTW, I really like the photography on your blog. Very artistic.

  3. Yes, lists are good, lists are my saviors, especially now...I need all the "sorting" I can get.

    Thanks Pammie!

  4. charli, it sounds like you have thought about it a lot, and you know what you want and need. im glad, and i hope that eventually you find that person that can fill that role for you.

    its good that you have reflected long on what you want and need, and it sounds like you know the difference.

    good for you. good luck.


  5. Yes, Finbar, I know the difference between what I want and what I need;

    I know that what I "think" I want is often different than what I really want.

    I know that what I do "want" is quite often what I need.

    And I know that what I need is very often not what I want.